Jealousy is an ugly thing: Homily for Thursday, January 18, 2024
We don’t want people to know we’re jealous, but we really are. But the problem is, when we try to force jealousy and keep it hidden, oftentimes it only makes the decisions that arise from jealousy all that much worse.
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Readings for Today. Listen to our other podcasts.
Today’s unwillingness by King Saul to acknowledge his jealousy, leads him on a path that will not end well.
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Jealousy is an ugly thing
Remember what I said a couple of days ago, Saul’s fundamental flaw. He cares too much what other people think. Well, that flaw wasn’t the problem. It was that he couldn’t really admit it to himself and deal with it.
You see, this was a great victory for David. If David had not defeated Goliath, and quite frankly, with conventional methods, it doesn’t seem likely that the Israelites would have defeated the Philistines, then not only is Saul not king, but he’s in service to the Philistines, and things are going to go really badly for him as the king of the conquered people.
But he just can’t admit his flaw. He gets jealous. You know, jealousy is one of those feelings that we have a hard time admitting. We don’t generally announce to a group of people with great joy and happiness, “Oh, by golly, I am feeling so jealous today.”
You see, the very nature of the feeling sometimes is such that we want to hide it. We don’t want people to know we’re jealous, but we really are. But the problem is, when we try to force jealousy and keep it hidden, oftentimes it only makes the decisions that arise from jealousy all that much worse.
Therein is Saul’s problem. And he is not going to be able to get past this problem. Things are not going to end well for Saul. What about us? How much time do we spend in our lives, firstly, comparing ourselves to others and getting jealous? “Oh, I wish that I had this skill with accounting, because I just couldn’t add up two numbers correctly for all the money in the world.” Or, “I wish that I was being recognized for all the great things that I’m doing, not this other person over here.”
I’m going to suggest that the antidote to jealousy is gratitude. Imagine if Saul had made it his project to be thankful for what David had done, to be grateful about how God rose up David at the right time to do something marvelous. Imagine what life would be like for us if, when we look around and we say, “Why is she getting all the attention?” If we just simply said, “Thanks be to God that she used her talents so well for the good of so many.”
You see, Saul really had two real things to do. I mentioned one. If he had simply been grateful, I think so many things would have been better. If he could have admitted, “You know what? That’s a stupid, silly song. Who cares? I’m still the king.” But he couldn’t. And the other is, he couldn’t bring himself to care what God thought of him. See, that’s true for all of us. God has given us gifts and talents and abilities, and God is the one who brings them all together so that when we are who God has made us to be, There is cause for great rejoicing.
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From the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous “ we are dealing with that most terrible human emotion—jealousy.”